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lighthouse (Peggy's Cove, east coast Canada).
What Does the Bible Say About … NON-INTIMATE RELATIONSHIPS?

If you are in a marriage without intimate relations, orally and passionately and have tried to remedy the problem before, with no successes what do you do? The love is there in friendship only, there is also a lot of mental anguish as well.

This is a case that is taking the Lord Jesus’ attention. As the question is being asked, I feel in my Spirit that He cares not only for the problems to be solved but that the person involved should know WHO HE IS. The healer of all flesh! He is the Lord of all flesh with whom there shall be no impossibilities – Luke 1:37.

Healing Belongs to Us:

The Lord Jesus did not only die and resurrected, when he resurrected he gave his disciples power over every unclean spirits:

Mark 16:15-18

“He said to them, “Go into all the world and preach the good news to all creation. Whoever believes and is baptized will be saved, but whoever does not believe will be condemned. And these signs will accompany those who believe. In my name they will drive out demons; they will speak in new tongues; they will pick up snakes with their hands, and when they drink deadly poison it will not hurt them at all; they will place their hands on sick people and they will get well”

This is the word of Jesus that is still authentic today!. Unfortunately many people believe the legislations and words of men that can fail than to believe the Word from the Lord.

The case above is an affliction of the devil. The Lord has given us authority over the power of the enemy.

It should be understood that the devil’s ministry in this relationship is in three-fold:

John 10:10 “The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life and have it to the full.

The devils ministry (work):




One Tangible Ministry of the Lord:


He is interested in your total being. He is keen in having your home full with joy and happiness. He will be glad seeing you to be joyful mother and father of children. Our God hates divorce for whatever reason!

He does not want anyone to be depressed, oppressed and afflicted by the enemy. That is why he has thrown the invitation to everyone; no matter your race, color of ethnicity:

“Come unto me all of us that labor and are heavy laden and I will give you rest” – Matthew 11:28 (KJV).

Let us be frank with ourselves. This case is a heavy-laden. Divorce is not the solution. The solution is in JESUS. As long as you can come to him by faith, He has promised; He will give you rest (heal), remove sorrows and pains (emotionally and spiritually).

Some weeks ago, a young physics university graduate was troubled by demons. He had started to work in a flourishing company in Nigeria and became mentally imbalanced. I was privileged to minister to this young boy and he was delivered from this spirit of destruction that wanted to turn him mad in his youthful age. The parents believed Jesus could heal him. He was healed because Jesus had paid the price on his behalf. He is doing well to the glory of God. As at the time of writing this message of healing to you, this boy is busy in our library studying the Word of God so that his deliverance from the enemy can be sustained and guaranteed till eternity. He will like to go into the world and teach others how to be delivered.


What else belongs to us apart from eternal life that the Lord Jesus has offered to everyone that will rent from his/her sins and believe him as Lord and Savior? It is simply healing that you will claim by faith.

Isaiah 53:4,5

4 Surely he took up our infirmities and carried our sorrows, yet we considered him stricken by God, smitten by him, and afflicted. 5

5 But he was pieced for our transgressions, he was crushed for our iniquities, the punishment that that brought us peace was upon him, and by his wounds we are healed.(KJV).

If you will believe the above scriptures with the whole of your heart without wavering, I believe the affliction upon you will go away. He has been afflicted because of you. Why must you be afflicted?. He was made a man of sorrow because of you. Why must you be sorrowful? Don’t believe the devil’s lie that you cannot be healed. If medical science has failed, why not try Jesus. Repent and Believe the Gospel. Let your faith rise up with the Word of God and move into your inheritance, which is healing already provided by the Lord!.

Friend, all you need is faith. Faith is the raw material needed for this “product” (healing).


I had appropriated God’s blessing upon my life a number of times. I remember many years ago when I had high blood pressure. Doctors told me that I could not be healed. I was always going about with drugs that would control the blood pressure. One day, I stumbled into a scripture and I believed it. Since then, I had been healed. This is the scripture:

Exodus 15:26

“He said: “If you listen carefully to the voice of the LORD your God and do what is right in his eyes, if you can pay attention to his commands and keep all his decrees, I will not bring on you any of the diseases I brought on the Egyptians, for I am the LORD, who heal you”

Did you see the condition for healing? Can you obey these conditions? Keeping all his commandment is to love your neighbor as yourself after you might have repented and walk in love.

Refuse to believe the devil’s lie. Refuse to believe what the doctors have said. Move into what belong to you. You will see the glory of the Lord. It is not the will of God that you should not enjoy one of the things that can unite your marriage.

Believe is all you need. Doubt is of the devil. Simply believe and you will see the glory of God!

I remember late last year, a couple came to my office. Actually I invited them because I wanted them to know the Lord. As I continued to minister to them, the Lord said to me that one of them was having problems. The man said that it was himself that was under affliction. That he was able to perform (have sex) for the first few weeks of marriage and afterwards he became impotent. Because I know that this is the affliction of the enemy, I ministered to the man in the name of JESUS, the Son of the Living God. The two of them believed and immediately the man was healed. He is now functional as man. I mean he is having sex and enjoying it with the wife of his youth. He gave the above testimony to the glory of God in the presence of God’s people in our church.

“Jesus Christ is the same, yesterday, and today and forever more… Hebrew 8:13

Colossians 1:13

13…(God) has delivered us (translated us)…

The word “translate” here means to take out of one kingdom and put into another kingdom. God has taken us out of the kingdom of darkness; that means He’s taken us out from under the authority of darkness; out of the power of darkness; and out of the control of darkness.

If anything has power over you, it has authority over you. If anything has power you, it rules and dominates you. But the believe is not to be ruled by demons, evil spirits, or anything to do with Satan’s kingdom. The believer cannot be ruled by demons and evil spirit unless he allows it. If Satan can rule believers, then that means the Body of Christ can be ruled by demons and evil spirits. But Jesus is the Head of the Body, so Satan has no right to rule and dominate Jesus’ Body.

You are healed by His stripes (wounds)!.

Rev Debo Adeyemo


My husband and I are just friends for many years now because of his illness. I was young when this first happened and was sad, and sometimes angry. After I was saved 3 years ago , I started to understand that it is nothing that I did or my husband and most of all God. This has brought me closer to God. His ways is not our ways but he knows what’s best for us even before we ask. God is so good. God Bless,



In regards to the marriage, I have one where it is not the passion that has died, but the body will not erect. We find that the relationship that we have is sufficient to get me through the these times. We have been married 40 years and have so much to share in our lives. I was also told by a minister that I could solace myself. I try not to do this as I respect my husband very much. even if it is proper with God, it is very difficult. It is also very difficult to lay in bed beside someone that has fathered your children and not have him touch you. I do try to remain celibate.


I didn’t start my marriage unequally yoked but after I became a Christian, the relationship deteriorated badly. I read a book called “Unequally Yoked” so I knew that I was to win my husband by my example but that if an unbeliever leaves, you are to let him go. That happened when we had been married for 29 years and was a terrible thing to go through. Because of our long marriage, we had to divide a lot of assets and thanks to the attorneys involved, it became very nasty. However, it has been the biggest faith builder to see how God has taken care of me these past 7 years.

Whenever there was a decision to be made, I always prayed about it and chose to take the high road and it served me well. I have a serious chronic illness that the Lord has chosen not to heal, yet, so I am not able to work steady enough to support myself so my ex-husband has done it willingly. We are now great friends and I love and respect him more than I ever have. I am still praying for his walk with the Lord and I see lots of sign of progress there. This is not an endorsement for divorce in any way as I believe that God does hate divorce but he was able to use a horrible situation and turn it to my good. I wonder if the time will come when God will lead us to be under the same roof again. I have chosen not to date as I believe God intended me for only one man for all time but since our children were grown, that was a very individual choice. It may not be God’s will in each situation but I believe it to be true in mine. The whole experience has been very unusual but it has brought me so much closer to the Lord. God truely does work in mysterious ways.

Blessings Gayla


If you are in a marriage without a intimate relations? This is a hard one to answer. For I am in that kind of marriage. No, passion. I love this man as a friend. He means alot to me. But their is no passion for him. 37 yrs. I need this answered for me. How do you feel something that hasnt been their for more years then you can remember. We can laugh togethor and we get along just fine. But not in the intimate or the passion side. Im sorry. Maybe I shouldnt share this. But it was the Bible Question that made me think. There are things that took place in our marriage, that I have forgiven. The Lord has helped me to look at alot of things through his eyes. I have prayed. But still waiting for a answer. I`ve even thought if he would repent and found the Lord. We could find this passion I have losted. What do you think? Your Friend

In Christ



There are many options. I think a marriage councilor would be appropriate. But the ultimate solution would be from God, in one form or another. I think prayer would be very effective.



This can be a “testing trial!” Though I’m not married, I do know that the Bible has the answer to any & all questions, situations- that we may face, as well as some situations we may not face, personally! We should-as always- PRAY ABOUT THE SITUATION. Read about it in the Bible to discover what God has said about an issue. And don’t forget to meditate on the reading while contrasting reading with the issue. While meditating, be sure to listen for God’s corrective soft voice/lead in the direction of that which is right! The Bible says that HE WILL NEVER LEAVE NOR FORSAKE US.


I have been married to R for 15 years, we have a son 13 and raised 5 other kids (from my first marriage), R is the world’s best provider. He is an honest man, a believer, a workaholic but he has no need for any sort of emotional, mental or physical relationship. He has severe tinitus (ringing in his ears) from working with loud engines for years. This causes him to require noises in order to sleep. So he ends up on the sofa with the tv on and the ceiling fan on at least 6 days a week. He finds idle chit-chat irritating so conversations are about necessities. I know he loves us, though this realization was difficult to grasp for a long while. I had to learn to stop judging his love by MY own definition, rather to learn HIS definition. It is rough at times. Human nature causes most of us to need affection. I pray for him continually, have for the past ten years. I have learned that my main purpose is to stay loyal to Christ, to be a good homemaker and mom and to keep him covered in prayer. Sometimes I get a good case of the me-me’s, then I cry to God about exactly what I need. The affection and attention I receive is usually in one to one time with God. I pray that one day, God will change R’s heart toward being affectionate and conversive. Until then, I just pray and wait. After all our vows did say for better or for worse. Much of our life is wonderful, this one area I will wait on.

M Blanscet